So another guy from Nerve.com asked me out. This one was smart enough to ask me out to sushi. Which is the fastest way I’ll say “yes” to a date. This one was an improvement over Tuesday night’s date. For starters, he showed up. Major points. Now, here are my notes from the date.
- His profile picture looked 10 years younger. I should have suspected something when his pictures only showed his face. Everything else was cropped out.
- He asked too many questions. I know this sounds strange since usually this isn’t a problem with guys. But some of the questions were not first date material. He wanted to know EVERYTHING about me. He asked about family members, including what my brother does for a living. He asked if I had pictures of my family members on my phone (I only showed him a picture of my niece because I show my niece to everyone). He wanted to know about my high school and college years. All this in a 90 minute date.
- He asked me my favorite question… “Where is Armenia?” This question really pisses me off. If you know you’re going out with an Armenian girl, and don’t know where the country is located, I suggest you google it. There’s no bigger turnoff than someone showing ignorance and asking me where it is. I’m willing to give a person a free pass on this issue if they didn’t already know that I’m Armenian. But if someone knows in advance AND has to ask me, that annoys me.
- He kept calling me Elizabeth.
- He said I could pass for Persian, and I agree, and he also mentioned that he really likes “ethnic women.”
- He found a way to mention that he bought a brand new Mercedes. For some reason this was a turnoff for me. It might have had to do with the fact that earlier in the day I was discussing my peoples’ obsession with expensive cars with my therapist. But also, the way he mentioned his new car seemed like he was bragging.
- He was really touchy-feely. He kept finding ways to rub my leg. He hugged me when he first met me and hugged me when we said good bye.
- He was wearing more accessories than I was.
- He might have ADD or a drug habit. He works in finance, is a white male, so I’m putting my money on coke. In any case, his mind seemed to be all over the place. He told me 2 stories about his online dating experiences and both of them he had told me the day before. He assumed my name is Elizabeth despite the fact I had told him it’s Eliza when he called me couple of days earlier. We even had an entire conversation about how he thought it’s Elizabeth and I told him no it’s Eliza (both over the phone and via email). When he called on Monday to confirm the date he called me Elizabeth, yet again. If we didn’t have plans for sushi, I probably would not have gone on a date with him. Nothing against the name Elizabeth. It’s a lovely name and the name of one of my closest friends (Hi Boonsky). But it’s NOT my name.
- He said he had a really good time and wants to see me again. I had a decent time but feel no chemistry. Now I need to find a way to get out of seeing him again.
Anyway, he left a message today wanted to know if he could see me again. I don’t know if I should give this one more chance. Or, should I just tell him now that I just don’t feel the chemistry.
I asked my therapist why Armenians have this need to drive expensive cars. My therapist, who’s also Armenian, mentioned that our people, along with other ethnic groups who have been oppressed, feel an innate need to show their value in the world by investing in material possessions. In the case of my people, this often involves expensive luxury cars. She mentioned that this is the post-Genocide effect. So in a way, the obsession with cars and other material possessions might have to do with the need to be remembered. This comes back to a comment Hitler made about the Armenian Genocide, saying that “no one remembers the killing of Armenians” implying that no one would remember the killings of the Jews. This theory makes a lot of sense.
(P.S. I hope he doesn’t find my blog in the cyberspace).