Dating & Facebook

I took a week off from Facebook. I’m back. But on a part time basis. And I’m contemplating my next move. Do I defriend him? Do I defriend him and block him? Or do I keep him as a “friend” on Facebook.

Here’s the background story.

About a year ago, my BFF Laura kept telling me she wanted to go to a comedy show with her. She kept casually mentioning that one of her friends is a comic and we should go check out one of his shows. Let’s call him Rod. I kept ignoring her because she does not have the best track record when it comes to setting me up on dates and it was obvious she was trying to set me up. The last time she tried to set me up on a date, it was with a guy who I was convinced was gay. Come to think of it, he had manboobs and I don’t know that many gay guys with manboobs. In any case, Laura’s first attempt at setting me up was with the most asexual human being on the planet. Come to think of it, there is no way he could be gay because I find gay guys attractive. Laura’s second attempt was a small step above the asexual dude. It was with a skinny, bald dude who kept hitting on the slutty chick at the party and that was my clue that he wasn’t that into me… which was fine because I wasn’t that into him. There were no further attempts at setting me up unless I count the time when Laura created a profile for me on But I digress. The point is, her track record has not been great.

About a month ago, a friend suggestion popped up on Facebook. It was Rod. We had 2 mutual friends so he kept coming up as a suggestion. I looked at his profile and thought to myself, “Wow. He’s cute.”  I clicked on some pictures and again, all cute pictures, not just from certain flattering angles. Then I realized that I may have seen him perform in the LA comedy circuit. My ex-roommate is an actress/comic/waitress/casting assistant and I was pretty sure I had seen him perform at one of her comedy shows. I decided to email. I never ever email/contact a friend suggestion unless I actually know them. But I did. I told him that we were both friends with Laura and another friend and that I was pretty sure I had seen him perform at a comedy club 3 years earlier (and I distinctly remembered asking my ex-roommate about the cute comic). So we started exchanging emails. Then he asked to be my friend on Facebook. Then he asked for my phone number, which led to a phone call, which led to a date.

Here’s the dilemma. We’ve been out on a few dates. There have been numerous phone calls, text messages and Facebook communication, etc. But I feel like Facebook is killing romance. I needed to take a step back. I stopped posting updates. I took a week off. And honestly, I also needed a break from his status updates. It sounds really ridiculous when I type this. I got really sick of having his status updates show up on my news feed. Every time he posted something, it seemed like only women commented and some were just blatantly flirting. I’m not a jealous person. He’s not doing anything wrong. He’s not saying anything wrong, bad or inappropriate. I just don’t want to be exposed to so much information. I don’t care if 50 women are commenting. I just don’t want it in my face. I want some degree of mystery.

I took a week off from Facebook. I didn’t want him to know what was going on in my life without making an effort. I needed a break from over-sharing. Facebook kills romance.

And now I’m faced with a decision. Do I stay friends, delete or block.

P.S. Happy Valentine’s Day

P.P.S. Most comics/actors/entertainers are really insecure and constantly seeking validation. This gets REALLY exhausting.



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